HOW OLD IS HUDDAH MONROE?

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By Baba Mboga,

I was legit just waiting on Huddah to stop making noise on the gram so I could do this piece

What’d you say again sweetie?

That thing about publicity?

Well…consider me you PR head (or something)

And consider me doing you a favor as far as that’s concerned…

Because this just might be some of the best publicity you’re going to recieve in 2020.

I don’t see any other Hushpuppis getting arrested this year.

Here’s your quote by the way:

Quick question though Irene,

Yup,

To the person asking “Who the hell is Irene,”

I got you bad…

How old were you again?

That was the question I was just about to ask,

Lemme just say that this one has been a hard one to catch.

Michael Scoffield wa Kenyan personalities.

Normally, the other ones try not to mess up.

Lakini with you we know the tea is always there,

Lakini nayo kabla ipatikane…

Like that incident where Joho took your car and gave it to Ommy Dimpoz

It was on all tabloids but it just flew under the radar…

OK,

I need to stop letting my mind wander…

The age thing isn’t really as important as how you get your money.

Which we might discuss too by the way…

Along with where she lives and whatnot…

You know, the usual Baba Mboga manenos…

But let’s get through with this ASAP.

The poll

So, Obare ni nani?

Mans came through with a poll

Asked it clear as day.

Here were the results…

I mean Huddah uses a shit ton of makeup and well…

Thanks to Huddah cosmetics, we don’t see that ending anytime soon.

I mean, her passport says 1992,

But if you really believe in corruption in Kenya,

…and a few Jason Bourne Movies,

It’s pretty obvious to state that she’s older than she says she is.

OR…

She could be a vampire, idk. Just chasing theories out here…

She literally said it herself, lol

Tea pickers actually dug up a pic of her without makeup so umhhh…

You be the judge.

The theories…

So tea pickers came in with the quickness in response the poll in question.

And they had some really convincing theories,

With evidence

She was actually said to be in Vitimbi which was confirmed by Mama Kayai.

The actual video has been taken down but

Here’s the story.

And since we all know that Vitimbi aired in the 90s…

And she was 16 at the time…

Nope,

It don’t add up at all with a 1993 birth certificate.

We can just refute this claim as is.

But who knows,

Maybe you can prove me wrong.

The music videos

There are also claims that she was in the “Juala” music video.

Check the girl on the right at 2:15

The evidence is kinda shaky on this one…

I mean it doesn’t look like her so that’s out of the window obviously…

But we’re not done yet…

The jaguar music video

Another tea picker was quick to note that Huddah was also in the “Nimetoka mbali.” by Jaguar and Tanzanian musician AY.

At least this one holds ground and you can actually see it’s her,

Heck,

Jaguar even acknowledges seeing her in the music video shoot.

Check the full story on Edgar Obare’s highlights

But still,

She was born in 1993,

This song came out in 2009?

She would be 16?

It gets more twisted…

Like the vixen that she always wanted to be,

She was once again spotted in the “Twende ndani” video by Pilipili by another tea picker.

Which was shot in 2008.

According to her birth certificate,

she was supposed to be 15 at the time.

We all know what 15 year olds look like so you tell me…

How old do you think she is in this music video?

I know that alot of you will look at the girl in green but notice the girl in pink at 0:51 and tell me that it isn’t Huddah.

She’s in the same outfit that she was in during the viral video where she was under the block for not having teeth (which isn’t wrong but meh…)

Here’s the pic for comparison:

We can at least establish that we had a 20 something year old person in 2008.

Because well… looks.

Her school life

So, we might have that person that we schooled with that made it in life.

And we all tend to remember how older they were relative to our age and even remember what year they finished school.

This wasn’t very different in this case.

A tea picker inboxed Edgar and talked to him about Huddah finishing primary school in 2002.

Check it out.

This kinda fits the whole narrative because well…

Huddah admits to being raised in Kitengela in her interview with Kalekye Mumo.

It’d make sense since she would be closer to home.

Someone also explained where Alhuda got her name.

From a school that is also conveniently around Kajiado,

But back to the story,

Any person that did 8-4-4 probably completed primary school at 14

Let’s use that age as an example.

If she was 14 in 2002

She’d be 20 in 2008 which would definitely make more sense.

Which would mean that she would be 32 right now?

Give or take of course…

Jesus,

I’m even tired writing all this…

Can we talk about her money in another blog please?

I promise it’ll be here tomorrow.

Also,

Here’s my Instagram.

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Anonymous
Anonymous
3 years ago

I like your narration

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