Happy International Men’s day 2020. This year the theme is Better health for men and boys.

So international men’s day is celebrated on November 19 every year across the globe. And it is a special day to recognize the sacrifices and contributions of a son, husband, fiance, father, and others.

It is also a day celebrated to focus on men’s health, improving the relations between the different genders, to highlight the roles of men, and to recognize their efforts in building up families as well as communities across the globe.

Well, honestly speaking I didn’t know there was such a thing as ‘international men’s day’. It sounds new. And no I’m not being ignorant. It’s just that there is no so much attention being given to this day (even though it has been in existence for the past two decades) such as that seen on women’s day or mothers’ day.

So by this year’s theme ‘ better health for men and boys’ I will focus on men’s mental health.

Men cry too

Did it hit home when Juliani sang pia mi hucry kwa crisis. Pia mi najua mwanaume sio biceps?

Unfortunately, so many men are told to dismiss their feelings when they are younger through comments like don’t be a girl when they show sensitivity, or be a big boy and don’t cry when they are hurt.
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A whole childhood of dismissing their feelings results in them not being familiar with their internal emotional world.

And, when they grow up, they are all of a sudden supposed to be able to access their feelings and be emotionally available to their partners and their children.
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Many men feel depressed or anxious but don’t want to admit it because they don’t want to appear weak which is one of the reasons why the suicide rate for men is so high.

You see men cry too, men break down, men have emotions, men feel insecure, men get abused, men have mental illnesses. And no its not unmanly to struggle.

It is okay men

Dear men, I shouldn’t even have to tell you this, but in a world full of man ups and grow some balls I feel like I need to tell you that it’s okay to reach out. It’s okay to struggle. It is okay to ask for help. It’s okay to break down. And you certainly do NOT need to accept abuse from your partner or anyone else just because you’re a man and (as people claim) “you should deal with it like a real man”.

You don’t have to struggle in silence. You don’t have to do this alone.

Emotions and pain have no gender. We need to be encouraging men to speak out and seek support, not letting them suffer in silence.

Thank you, men

Dear men, thank you for all the amazing things you do, including showing the vulnerable side of you. To men who are providers and protectors, thank you.

To the men who work so hard to make ends meet, to the selfless and responsible men, thank you. Also to the fearless, ambitious men who accept when they have fallen short…

Men, your value in society is priceless.

As we celebrate Men all over the globe, let’s take a moment to pass this message to our male friends: REAL MEN DO NOT RAPE!

Happy international men’s day!!! Better mental health for our boys and men.

By Wanjiru Mbaru